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It was inevitable that someone would take the undeniably stupid but kind of cool sport of competitive eating and twist it into something completely revolting. That someone is Neal Tiles, the Take 2 Person of the Week.

Tiles is the president of the G4 television network. He is the one who gave the green light to “HURL!” The gameshow, which will debut July 15 on Tiles’ obscure cable outpost, is described as follows on G4’s Web site:

“ ‘HURL!’ participants are subjected to a series of challenges: Spiraling down a tunnel in a steel cage ball after eating mounds of Mac ’n Cheese … saddling up for a bucking, spinning, spew-inducing thrill ride on the mechanical bull after downing a passel of franks ’n beans … and much more! Last contestant to spew can win a cool grand plus bragging rights as ‘Iron Stomach Champion.’ ”

Safe to say that not many viewers will be flipping back and forth between this and “Charlie Rose.”

I’m not a prude about bodily-function humor, but stop the ride, I want to get off. Waiting eagerly to watch people vomit? If this isn’t rock bottom, I don’t want to imagine what is.

It will be Neal Tiles’ legacy that he took America’s least-common denominators and made them even stupider than they were a half-hour before.

posted by Don "Moses" Lerman  # 3:37 PM